Psychosexual Therapy: Sex Therapy
Most people have difficulties with sex at some point in their lives and, like relationship issues, this is simply natural. We anticipate, and accept, that our general health may have variations as we live our lives, but we somehow buy into the fantasy that our sex lives will, and should, remain, steadily the same. As we start to think this through we can immediately see where our beliefs might be getting stuck.
It is often very confusing to try and unravel whether it is unresolved relationship tensions and difficulties that are causing the sexual issues, or, whether in fact, the sexual problems existed historically and came into this relationship; either way, your relationship may well feel tense, compromised and unhappy by this point.
Sometimes simply being able to talk frankly and openly about sex in an informed, non-judgmental and non-shaming space can, in and of itself, prove beneficial and positive. For some, it maybe that a few sessions of reflective and open discussion is all thats needed, where as for others a more structured and specific approach is a more appropriate way forward.
Coming as an individual to explore difficulties in sex therapy can be greatly rewarding. Please don't imagine that this work is only for couples as this is not the case. The beauty, flexibility and creativity of sex therapy is that we can work together to address the particular challenges you, or both of you, are facing.
Sex therapy works through discussion, activities to do at home, both individually and together and, when needed, some straight forward information giving. You will learn many new ways to understand more about your own sexuality and deepen the erotic and sexual connection. Because we are all different, because the nature of our relationships and sexual problems are unique, we need to explore the right and effective direction for you. However, it is also true to say that for sex therapy to be most effective, clients need to accept that time and motivation are very important.
So many of the problems listed below can be effectively treated in Sex Therapy and many of these difficulties come about because of the way we think about sex and sexuality. That is why there is a psycho-sexual element to my practice.
The way you think matters.
What are the most common issues people bring to sex therapy?
- Sex has become routine and is always the same.
- I feel I have no desire for sex. It's just gone. This is confusing and upsetting.
- To avoid sex we’ve started going to bed at different times, we aren't really kissing. I /we are now anxious about inviting intimacy into our relationship. We actively keep some distance between ourselves.
- There may be erectile difficulties; losing erections, coming too quickly or too slowly.
- There are difficulties with orgasm; reaching them, coming too quickly then losing interest.
- Maybe there are body image issues and sexual confidence issues.
- You may be questioning your sexual identity, wanting to explore new or different elements causing divergence from your partner.
- There may be vaginal discomfort or painful sex.
- There maybe unresolved historical trauma or abuse.
- Porn may have framed the way you are now having sex. Porn can often be a major player in a couples sexual issues.
People bring these and other concerns to psychosexual therapy.
If you can relate to some of what is listed, or you just want to find out more, please do contact me on